A Metaphor of Sorts

Canadian provinces have jurisdiction over policing and the administration of justice. BC has the responsibility of funding the police, and setting police priorities.

All police in BC are under the authority of the Police Act, an act of the BC Legislature. This includes both RCMP and municipal police.

Sensible BC proposes an amendment to the Police Act, instructing police not to spend any time, money or resources on cases of simple possession of cannabis.

A metaphor’s used quite a lot

As a proxy for something it’s not

Like the time long ago

When a fellow I know

Got arrested for smoking some … radishes

Many people smoke radish, or kale

Although some say they didn’t inhale

But it’s really no joke

When for one little toke

On a radish you wind up in jail

Wrapping up, I’ll try not to be crass

To the cops though, “Alack and alas,

Cuz the last time I checked

You should serve and protect

So do THAT and get off of my … vegetable patch”

For more information, go to http://sensiblebc.ca/

Sarah, True to Form

I'm breaking a promise I made to myself. Based on the faint hope that if everyone ignored her, she might just go away, I swore I wouldn't write about Sarah Palin anymore. But, she won't go away and I can't help relapsing. Sarah now hosts an online subscription channel and here's what she posted in response to a recent speech by Elizabeth Warren.

“We believe”? Wait, I thought fast food joints…huh. Don’t you guys think that they’re like of the Devil or somethin’ I was. Liberals, you want to send those evil employees who would dare work at a fast food joint then ya just don’t believe in, thought you wanted to, I dunno, send them to Purgatory or somethin’ so they all go VEGAN and, uh, wages and picket lines I dunno they’re not often discussed in Purgatory, are they? I dunno why are you even worried about fast food wages because…Well, we believe an America where minimum wage jobs they’re not lifetime gigs they’re stepping stone.”

Her tongue get’s entwined in a knot

As though demons, her mind, have besot

She on principle can’t

Disengarble her rant

Holding grammar a government plot

See the full story, including video, at Salon.com

Cheap and Petty

There's not much to say about this limerick. A couple of online images caught my eye and I mashed them together.

Mr Harper, now please don’t get mad

If I pick on you more than a tad

I’ll concede you take care

Of your Lego like hair

But at photo-bombs, really, you’re sad

In case you're interested, here's the second image:

DYAC

Auto correct errors are now accepted as part of modern communication. Fat fingers and tiny keys can lead to hilarious and sometimes awkward exchanges. Here’s one fictional example. You can tell it’s fictional, because neither of my daughters would use the word ‘rad’.

The texts from my daughter are rife

With ways auto-correct causes strife

Once she typed in “Dear Dad,

You’re so totally rad!”

But it came out “You’ve ruined my Life #@!”

Can I Say Bullshit Here?

Did you know that 97% of scientists are in agreement that human activity is contributing to global warming? In light of that scientific consensus, it’s difficult not to ridicule the climate change deniers in Washington (and Ottawa). Their latest subterfuge is to claim an inability to form an opinion due to their lack of scientific credentials. Here’s Speaker of the House John Boehner doing just that: "Boehner on Climate Change" and here’s my polimerick response:

When climate deniers admit

They’re not experts in science, to wit

Johnny Boehner avows

We can blame it on cows

What they mean is they don’t give a shit.

Lack of Wills and Immigration Pills

Immigration reform in the United States is becoming a bigger problem with each passing month. Refugees from several troubled Latin American countries are crossing the border, any way they can. Meanwhile, the Republican congress refuses to discuss the bipartisan immigration bill proposed by the senate about a year ago. One of their bizarre arguments for not debating the legislation is that the border should be secure before addressing the issue.

Immigration reform is a goal

But a recent Republican poll

Said "We know that we're ill,

But we won't take a pill

'Till our symptoms are under control"

Good Guys With Guns

If you haven't been keeping up, Target Stores finally and 'respectfully' have asked gun owners not to bring their weapons shopping. This is the latest chapter in a very heated debate and it got me thinking about the NRA's position on 'gun free zones' and their post Sandy Hook speech. That's the one in which Wayne LaPierre said the only defense against a bad guy with a gun, was a good guy with a gun.

On the blackboard, we've written in chalk

The advice from an NRA talk

And since Johnny hit Sloan

In the head, with a stone

Ev'ry kid in the class has a rock